Tuesday, November 4, 2008

a bit of introspection, or a sad commentary on the state of the union

As if to make up for vibrant orange, my latest Treasury is beige,beige,beige,beige,beige, but yes, not boring!

I want to share this crazy work of art-- half Atlas and half Mad Hatter,

JunkyardGypsy's World on His Shoulders Recycled Assemblage Art because her treasury got me a spot on Etsy's front page this morning.

Pumpkin or Sweet Potato



Thanks Gypsy!

Which brings me to my present state of mind. Thrilled to be on the front page and irritated with myself for feeling apprehensive about it.
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This is the second time on this blog I've mentioned that other's frustration at other's small successes bothers me. In principle it feels wrong to me. But right now it's very personal.
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It's in my basic personality to care about how other people feel and when I'm feeling down that translates into caring what they think. About me. Kind of. I gave this some major thought today.

When I'm well, I trust my own judgement (mostly) and pin my self image on how well I measure up to my own standards. When I'm not well, my standards get stomped all over so I pin my self image on how well I measure up to other people's standards. Meaning I care what they think of me. Even to the point where I feel concern over whether people I've never met, likely will never meet, and probably wouldn't like if I did, have noticed that I've been on the front page a few times and have blacklisted me for it.
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Logically I weigh the extra exposure against possible ill will and it's a no brainer. Illogically it concerns me. Logically this whole thing really concerns me, because it's a very unwise thing to pin my self image on and I plan to consciously work on it.
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So today, just give some thought to yourself and see if you've fallen into any unhealthy psychological habits without being aware of it. Take care of yourselves, or at least, give it your best shot.
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Sorry about the title. It was a little joke. A very little joke. Look there it goes . . .

5 comments:

  1. I have the take me or leave me attitude. I used to be totally affected by what other people thought even if I didn't know what they were thinking. I can't say that I am totally over that but I am me. If they don't like it, then they don't. I tried to be what everyone else wanted me to be but that caused very deep depressions because I wasn't me. I would rather not be liked than be in a deep depression worrying about what others think about me. Did I make sense or is it as clear as mud?

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  2. Sarah, please do not let those who rant and rave about repeat front page appearances for some artist while others have never even been in a treasury etc etc etc get to you. While we live in a country in which each vote counts as much as the next and every one has equal rights, we do not work in a community (Etsy) in which each artist is as talented as the next or takes pictures of their work as well as the next. We are not all on equal artistic footing and anyone who thinks we are needs to have their aesthetic examined. So there! ::getting off her podium now:: *hugs* CD

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  3. Marylin, you made sense:) And usually I'd be there with you, which is why I had to pin down why this was bugging me so much. Now that I see it, maybe I can get a handle on it.

    CD, I hear you:) and agree with you logically and intellectually. Now to get the rest of me on board. But just figuring out the issue made me feel tons better. Promise:D

    Thanks you two!

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  4. Oh, that sucks. The sour grapes, I mean. The front page appearances are awesome like you. I hope you can see your way clear to not let it get to you.

    Noli nothis permittere te terere. *grin*

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